When I get lonely and seek refuge
I sometimes find solace in subterfuge.
Upon the 2nd-floor balcony of Garfield's grave,
I'll drink a six-pack, laugh, and rave.
I propose no offense, but to just have fun
Soaking in the summer cemetery sun.

James A. Garfield Monument
Lakeview Cemetery in Cleveland Ohio

O what should we care
When we are dead
If those still alive dance upon our heads?
Ashes to ashes,
Yet stomp to stomp,
Let the living howl and the breathing romp!

I only hope that when I'm under dirt
And a partyer comes along
That she's wearing a skirt,
Has nice pink panties and is cleanly-shaved.
Then I'll pray hard
That she does misbehave!