July 25, 2001
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I've been sitting around for the last 15 minutes trying to think of things I could invent that could make me some money. So far I managed to brainstorm:
1) A substance that would stain stainless steel.
2) An umbrella that would automatically fold up in moderate to high winds so as to avoid fatal umbrella inversion.
3) A spam-like anti-booger spray that keeps boogers from sticking to your fingers when you pick your nose.
4) Russian Roulette Condoms--dares can be fun: one in the 12-pack is guaranteed to fail.
And last but not least...
4) Peelable stickers that you can place over the auto-flushing "eyes" of public latrines so as to avoid that embarrassing reduction to flush automation.
Now I bet you're wondering why I'm not afraid to share these ideas even prior to securing the all-important intellectual property-protecting patent??
See ya in the patent line!
Comments (437)
well that was a good snort
thanks!
LOL!
*anxiously waiting to see you on an infomercial sometime between 3 and 4am*
Hey, do you think you can help me sell my new invention? The EBTR...E-prop Body Temperature Regulator. My first customer was elgeoffro, and he loves it!!!
Here's props for the condoms!! lol
**
Proppin' 'til it hurts!!!
OH I love number 4!!
excellent!! 
#3.....LMAO!!!
I went to the patent office and I didn't see you. That was when I realized I'd been had.
Once again, your brilliance has blinded me!
I need the booger spray!
Oh, yuck.
put chewing gum over the urinal sensors ;p
~squints at the screen ... mentally reaches out and whaps the Not for Prop - het dude~
I have one word for you ... just one.
Latte
1. I think hydrochloric acid would stain the stainless steel.
2. What is "fatal umbrella inversion?" Is it fatal just for the umbrella, or the person holding it too? Hmmmm... maybe if the umbrellas were stainless steel....
3. What does spam-like have to do with anti-booger? Am I missing some new connection? How would spam stop boogers from sticking to your fingers?? Maybe if you had spam on your fingers, you wouldn't pick your nose??
4. Simply not cool.
5. Why not just cover the "eye" with a soggy was of toilet paper?? Like the spitwads that were stuck to the walls in high school?? Yum!!
Now if the booger doesn't stick to your finger, it won't come out your face. The finger would just slide right over it. That would take all the fun out of rolling and flicking.Ew, I'm getting gross here.
I'm ordering 10 pounds of stainless-staining substant immediately!
(My neighbours zinc is always immaculate)
In the words of montgomery burns: EXCCCCELLENT!
Hmm... You could have one of the twelve condoms give a short but powerful electrical jolt.
I only buy the 24 packs. 
LOL
You just took the first step down a slippery slope!
I give you CHINDOGU!!!!!
THE ANCIENT JAPANESE ART OF USELESS INVENTIONS.
http://www.chindogu.com/chindogu/chinchin.html
http://www.pitt.edu/~ctnst3/chindogu.html
Just make a disco Cd..and I'll buy it
yeah, i've got my "million dollar ideas" too. But i think some of them would actually make a million...so...not posting them. sorry.
Where's the order form? Where's the link to the website espousing the goods? Where's the inevitable associates program? Good ideas, but you are not going to get far with your provincial catering attitude. So, here is your solution: Let Someone do your marketing campaign. This is what I will do for you:
1. Stand on the rooftops and shout.
2. Play my car radio really loud with the windows down
3. Call every talk back show on the planet complaining about your competitors.
There, see that is an action plan! Now, you're set... well, almost. Let's talk about the finer details - such as the price for my services - a little later, over a cup of cold coffee - my invention to give McDonalds a chance to prevent lawsuits from people that drop their cups into their lap...
Hehehe those are great!
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A few years ago I'd have to pay someone for this information.
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Appreciation for this information is over 9000-thank you!
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AKAIK you've got the answer in one!
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I bow down humbly in the presence of such greatness.
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You Sir/Madam are the enemy of confusion everywhere!
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That's an intelligent answer to a difficult question xxx
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With the bases loaded you struck us out with that answer!
At last, someone comes up with the "right" answer!
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I just caught the MSNBC video segment, what a great site. My husband and I are both web dev/junkies and thought it would be totally fun to chart out diapers/feedings/naps/etc. of our newborn. Your telemetry-based charts are exactly what we had in mind, unfortunately we do not have the time to set them up. So we will just check out Trixie’s. Kudos to your effort here!
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Appreciation for this information is over 9000-thank you!
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Help, I've been informed and I can't become ignorant.
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Ppl like you get all the brains. I just get to say thanks for he answer.
Yeah that's what I'm talking about baby--nice work!
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I bow down humbly in the presence of such greatness.
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Is that really all there is to it because that'd be flabbergasting.
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These pieces really set a standard in the industry.
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I'm not easily impressed. . . but that's impressing me!
Is that really all there is to it because that'd be flabbergasting.
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