June 27, 2002

  • Will you gaze at the sky tonight?   Or even be aware if the heavens can be seen?


     


    Will you smell a flower today?  Or merely take them in as ornaments popping up along the way?


     


    Will you insist that life’s a celebration?  Or bow to the blasé with resignation?


     


    If I were a terrorist in America…


     


    I’d surely have taken credit by an anonymous El Shish Kabob phone call to press and authorities for the fires in Colorado and Arizona—even if I didn’t start them.  I mean, destruction is destruction.  And whether you’re really responsible or not, if people believe you are, and you proclaim yourself a terrorist, you’ll achieve the notoriety you seek and raise the general level of alarm and restlessness which terror seeks to incite.


     


    Remember when I blogged a few days back about a PHA (Potentially Hazardous Asteroid) that missed the Earth by only 75,000 miles on June 14th but wasn’t “discovered” by authorities until June 17th?  Hell, I’m wondering if a more likely scenario is that they saw the damn thing coming all along, didn’t know whether or not it would hit Earth, so decided to wait it out and then when it actually missed, “discovered it after the fact”?!  ha ha ha.  I’ll tell you what: if this post-passing “discovery” becomes the pattern for the closest ones, then I think I’m on to something!


     


    Some linguistic pet peeves of mine:


     


    “That’s like comparing apples with oranges.”


     


    Well, what’s wrong with comparing apples with oranges, or oranges with parrots, or parrots with motorcycles?  Does it strain the brain to compare things of inexact similarity?  Snapple compares ants to dogs in a Real Fact: “Ants have a better sense of smell than dogs.”  I say: O that is so great.  But dogs have a bigger nose.  LOL


     


    “What do you do for a living?”


     


    I’m always tempted to say, and more often than not, do reply:  “I breathe, I laugh, I cavort, I love, I frolic, and I run for a living.”  When the person asking then looks at me with that “Why are you avoiding my question” look, I clarify:  “Now if you meant: What do I DO…vis a vis  work, well, then that’s more a matter of what I DO for a dying .  Because my work only pushes me closer to the grave.  For a dying, I…”


     


    What do you think?  If we rename the Moon to “God”, then the Pledge of Allegiance can stand as is except it can only be recited when the Moon, I mean the “God” has risen over the continent?  I see this as a perfectly satirical compromise.   On the other hand, if the ban on “under God” stands up, I am more than willing to assist the courts in an extension of this ruling to “In God We Trust”.  Thereupon, I will appoint myself a True Defender of the Constitution and insist that all of you surrender your so-branded un-Constitutional money to me!

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